“Coronavirus crisis calls for the opposite of socialism” – Guest Opinion by Ari Kaufman

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Majority Leader Mitch McConnell wants the U.S. Senate to take quick action on a trillion-dollar stimulus plan to help Americans with expenses due to the Coronavirus pandemic.

The government would send a check after calculating an amount per individual or couple based on a taxpayer‘s adjusted gross income from 2018. Aid would be phased down at income thresholds of $75,000 per person ($150,000 per couple) and those individuals who earned six figures two years ago receive no relief.

This is an unnecessary exercise in jumping through federal government hoops to obtain a questionable result. McConnell is too shrewd a leader to fall for this. Democrats, meanwhile, seem mostly concerned with the name of the virus, bashing “corporations” and using straw man clichés like “workers over shareholders.” House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s House Bill was so rushed that it needed nearly 100 pages (!) of corrections and arguably would accelerate small business lay offs.

The most straightforward objection to the Senate bill is why base everything on 2018 AGI. Two years ago, many people’s lives were different. You may have sold a business, bought a house, or married since. There is no good rationale in going back two years to test incomes.

The people who most need help to financially survive the current panic lack income because their jobs disappeared this month, thus swift action surely is needed. 

Injecting liquidity is key to stabilizing the economy. Hospitals need help. Folks require money for groceries, rent, and maybe some proprietors can pay their remaining employees instead of shutting down.  A public school teacher, “non essential” government worker, or an accountant still being paid their same salary every fortnight does not need money urgently. They’re doing just fine.

Think instead about the entrepreneur who invested his life savings in a business only to see his customers vanish. Or ponder the recent college graduate with $50,000 in student-loan debt — not ironically taken on with the encouragement of Elizabeth Warren types — now laid off from her first job.

And if someone who receives a check is not desperate, have faith that he or she can figure out where to donate the money without government edicts.  

Two of the most impressive senators in recent days, as often is the case, are Marco Rubio and Ben Sasse. Both men offer realistic, responsible solutions. 

Rubio told CNBC last week he wants to use a network of lenders for an existing program to help small businesses and employees. He hopes to “figure out the most effective way to get cash into the hands of small businesses so that they can maintain payroll for at least a six-week period.”

The Florida Republican is sponsoring legislation to match President Trump’s call for $50 billion in loans from the Small Business Administration.  

Sasse, the only senator who lives his life completely outside the Washington bubble and has authored two recent books on related topics, gave a stellar St. Patrick’s Day Speech on the Senate floor. Everyone should watch it on YouTube.

The Nebraska Republican prefers letting governors direct spending instead of Washington-driven bailouts akin to “shoveling money out of a helicopter.” He instead called for most economic relief spending to be administered by state governors. He claims governors know how to target money more efficiently than U.S. Senators.

Sasse says we can’t mindlessly go down same path with spending people’s money. A dozen years ago, for example, President Obama irresponsibly tossed trillions into supposedly shovel-ready projects; most still can’t be found today. 

“This is not an opportunity for Washington’s connected insiders to exploit personal relationships, to put their pet projects first on things that they wouldn’t have been able to get passed if it weren’t a time of crisis. We don’t have to go down that path. Instead, we can more efficiently and more wisely spend the people’s resources,” Sasse said. “We can give our states and our governors the lead in making sure the majority of the money and the majority of the resources get where they’re most needed. We can help families and businesses keep afloat during this storm by admitting that 50 laboratories of democracy are going to be more effective than a rifle shot approach from Washington.”

The Senator is non-partisan, sentient, and correct.

Governors know their people, what their workforce needs, how to target money, and how to build public-private partnerships. Minnesota is not California, and Nebraska is not New York. Every state has unique needs that others may not. 

Polls show the least popular governors in America are still more popular than almost any DC-based Senator. There’s probably a reason. 

While state and local governments aren’t miracle workers, they have the capacity to restore companies and livelihoods to their prior economic standing better and more quickly than Washington.

No industry, company or person has an innate right to public money, no matter how severe the crisis. The principled Nikki Haley, likely already the 2024 GOP presidential frontrunner, was correct to resign her board seat late last week over Boeing’s pursuit of a government bailout. 

As an important Wall Street Journal staff editorial examined late last week:

“The politicians in Washington are telling Americans, as they always do, that they are riding to the rescue by writing checks to individuals and offering loans to business. But there is no amount of money that can make up for losses of the magnitude we are facing if this extends for several more weeks. After the first $1 trillion this month, will we have to spend another $1 trillion in April, and another in June?”

These are good questions. Bernie Sanders, who wants more and more spending and to “revolutionize” America and perhaps nationalize much of the economy, has no answers. 

Instead we receive the standard vacuous “these policies seem like socialism to me” claims from retired schoolteachers and assorted lazy lefties. 

They ignore that it’s PRIVATE companies developing a mass testing system, treatments and vaccines for coronavirus. Several private companies now have in place reliable testing systems already being mass-produced and distributed. 

A government-run “single-payer“ Bernie Sanders healthcare system is clearly not the answer in times of crisis (or normal times).

That would sap innovation, research and incentive. No cures would be found. We’d probably have millions dead already. As usual, the private sector works best for perilous moments. 

But let’s give state and local governments a shot at this before another capricious, bloated federal plan. 

A former teacher and historian, Ari Kaufman has worked as a journalist in various roles since 2006. He currently resides with his wife in Minnesota

I Got a Fevah…

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After weeks of speculation (and days of hyping it more than a new Lady Gaga CD), I’m finally breaking down and writing about the coronavirus. For those of you who have been living under a rock lately and aren’t familiar with the story (and for that I am eternally jealous), the coronavirus is a viral strain that appears to have started in China and has the potential to wipe out all life on Earth for centuries to come…or maybe it’s just like the flu. There are certain symptoms related to it, such as coughing, fever, shortness of breath, being overly pessimistic about the way the government is handling the situation, and being enough of a jerk to wish people of different political ideologies would contract it.

The first three are symptoms of people who have coronavirus. The latter two are symptoms of people who watch waaaaaaaay too much cable TV and Internet.

Seriously, the coronavirus has turned seemingly normal people into frothing-at-the-mouth lunatics whose humanity is more in question than Shawn King’s lineage. (As an aside, Shawn, I’m a Midwestern guy, and have more legit street cred than you do. Take your cul de sac cred and admit you’re Edgar Winter with some blush applied.) I have seen people on the Left wishing this on President Donald Trump and people on the Right wishing it on Nancy Pelosi, and few people outside the ideological Thunderdome are calling it out because then they would get targeted by these groups.

If that wasn’t bad enough, the media are hyping the story at every turn, even managing to put a little top-spin on their reporting to make the coronavirus outbreak look like it’s President Trump’s fault. Granted, some of the actions he’s taken on it have been slow and seemingly ignorant, but for someone who is thought of as being a fighter, the President hasn’t really been fighting back. He’s let the media paint a narrative that makes him look like, well, Donald Trump, or at least their version of him.

And when the media aren’t trying to Simon Bar Sinister up the President, they’re rushing out stories that would make H. P. Lovecraft cower in a corner asking for a plush C’thulu to hold. In turn, this worries people who still trust the media and sends them into a panic, buying up surgical masks at prices that could only gouge you more if they were literally screwed onto your face. And when there are shortages, the media report the shortage, which drives even more hysteria and worry. It’s gotten so bad, people are on record (seriously, I fear) as saying the coronavirus is caused by Corona Beer. If this is what the media are doing now, I can only imagine what will happen during Sweeps Week!

In trying to wrap my head around the various moving parts of this story, I came to one conclusion: this is not normal, kids. This is as far away from normal as I am from winning Mr. Universe, unless they start judging dad bodies instead of musculature. Then, I might have a shot. And after reading what people post online, I need a shot of booze to steady my nerves. And remember, a good number of these people can legally vote in the upcoming Presidential election. The tension is mounting to real-estate-brokers-trying-to-sell-property-along-the-Gaza-Strip-for-nothing-but-commission levels.

In fact, I’ve coined a term for what’s going on right now on the Left and Right where they treat each other worse than Ike treated Tina. I call it Coronavirus Fever. Put simply, it’s hypochondria with multiple social media platforms on blast. To determine if you have Coronavirus Fever, answer these simple questions:

–  Do you find yourself Tweeting every single news item you hear about the coronavirus to people who are friends of friends of friends so they can be up on the latest hot takes?

– Are you boycotting Panda Express, not because their food sucks, but because you’re afraid they’re in league with the Chinese government to spread the coronavirus here?

– Are you checking WebMD every 15 minutes to determine if you have the coronavirus and being relieved when you think it only says you have cancer?

– Have you started drinking hand sanitizer to fight off the coronavirus?

– Has the CDC blocked you on social media for “asking too many questions”?

If you’ve said yes to any or all of these, you have Coronavirus Fever. Oh, and you’re an idiot. Do you know the most effective way of fighting coronavirus or a good chunk of illnesses for that matter?

Wash your hands.

I’m not saying to take it to Howard Hughes levels, but use a little common sense, soap and water, and hand sanitizer (on your hands, not your innards). And if you feel sick, even a little, stay home and rest. Whatever it is you think you have to do today will still be there tomorrow. And for the love of Pete, think before you post! Not every nugget of what passes for news these days is important, and not everybody in what passes for news is trustworthy. Read up a bit, take a breath, figure out if what you’re intending on posting will help or hurt the situation, and act accordingly. (No, this does not mean post anyway.)

If you do these things, we will find a cure for the Coronavirus Fever in our lifetimes. Just in time for something else to kill us all. Cheers!

San Francisco 2020 – A Musical Parody

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With apologies to Scott McKenzie

To the tune of “San Francisco” by Scott McKenzie


If you’re going to San Francisco
Be sure to wear some work boots on your feet.
If you’re going to San Francisco
Watch out for needles and poop in the street.

For those who come to San Francisco
Be sure to grab a poop map
For the streets of San Francisco
Are literally filled to the curbs with crap.

All across the nation
Folks cry in frustration
“Where is Pelosi?”

It’s a bad situation
In need of sanitation
Where is Pelosi?
Where is Pelosi?

For those who come to San Francisco
You’ll find a lot of homeless people there
If you come to San Francisco
The horrid stench’s everywhere

If you come to San Francisco
You’ll want to get out of there.

‘Twas the Week After Impeachmas

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‘Twas the week after Impeachmas and all through the House
The Dems were still cheering at impeaching Trump, that louse!
The Articles were hung near the Senate with care
In the hopes that Cocaine Mitch would run a trial that’s fair.

The Squad were nestled all snug in their beliefs
That impeaching Trump would soon bring them relief.
And Speaker Pelosi in her Prada, after finishing a night cap,
Had just settled in for a long wine-fueled nap.

When out near the Mall there arose such a clamor
But Pelosi didn’t stir because, well, she was hammered.
Rashida Tlaib took charge, running out like a heifer,
And started screaming, “Let’s impeach that MFer!”

The moon on the snow made the light seem to dance
And made poor little Adam take a Schiff in his pants.
When what to his big bugged out eyes did appear
But a big monster truck with Trump/Pence on its rear.

With an orange-hued driver, so lively and plump
They knew in a moment it was President Trump
More rapid than Creepy Joe Biden feels shame
He called to his minions and called them by name.

“On Nunes! On Limbaugh! On Pence and Rudy!
On Laura! On Pirro! On Rush and Hannity!
To heck with Impeachmas and what the Left wants
Let’s fill up their Twitter accounts with our taunts!”

As dry heaves wracked the Speaker before she blew chow
The Left cried, “We impeached him, but how?
How is he still more popular than we think?”
When Ms. Pelosi replied, “I’ll have another drink.”

And then in a twinkling (or was it a thunk),
AG Barr then appeared and said, “Listen, you punks.
Your articles were bogus, not a crime to be had,
And John Durham knows if you’ve been good or been bad.”

Trump dressed in a suit, dark blue, almost black
And his fingers flew quickly as he Tweeted another attack
“Impeachment is a hoax! Dems hunt for a witch!
And Schiff is a low down dumb son of a snitch!”

His eyes, how they sparkled, each time he hit Send
And then he would insult them again and again
He questioned Dems’ ethics and the extent of their crimes
He mocked Elizabeth Warren, for the sake of old times.

He blew up their Twitters, he lambasted the news
He made them even angrier by supporting the Jews
He mocked them as weak and without many brains
And said, “Take a look at those Stock Market gains!”

AOC was astounded! Adam Schiff was aghast!
(Speaker Pelosi, of course, was still drunk off her ass.)
Bernie Sanders was furious! Liz Warren’s face looked quite grim.
Tom Steyer kept trying to get people to pay attention to him.

Mayor Pete was in shock, for Trump’s tactics he did resent!
Tulsi Gabbard showed up just to vote “Present.”
The blood from all the Left’s faces did drain
When their rhetoric made Marianne Williamson sound sane.

Trump’s minions arrived on the White House West Lawn
And made note the Left’s hopes of removing Trump were gone.
The Left made the bed in which they would now lie
And all they could do was yell, curse, and cry.

There would be no removal, the impeachment was for naught
And soon the full fury of John Durham would be wrought
Their crimes would be exposed, their hopes would be dashed
(But not before their checks from George Soros could be cashed).

Impeachmas was pyrrhic in spite of their bliss
‘Cause they forgot “If you come for the king, you better not miss.”
Even Speaker Pelosi, still tipsy from the booze
Knew in the upcoming election, they’d be lucky to lose.

With one final Tweet, the President did turn
And let the Left’s hopes for 2020 smolder and burn
As the truck sped off like a giant metal manta
AOC looked puzzled and asked, “Was that Santa?”

Do Not Stupid Here

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After watching the Left and the Right go on about President Donald Trump’s impeachment, I made a startling observation: impeachment is making everyone stupider. In my case, I feel myself getting stupider by watching people pontificate about impeachment while getting basic facts wrong, like what counts as impeachment.

Needless to say, I’ve been very depressed lately and wished the Sweet Meteor of Death had actually hit us in 2016.

A lot of this stupidity comes from a lack of even basic knowledge of civics and the Constitution. Turns out this kind of coursework isn’t even a requirement in many schools or it’s so slanted as to be utterly useless. We know more Kardashians than we do branches of government or Amendments in the Bill of Rights, but we have to be first with the hot takes so we appear to be informed. That’s why so many people on Twitter believed President Trump was impeached last week before the full House of Representatives cast a single vote in favor of the articles of impeachment. And I honestly believe a number of those same people think if Trump is impeached that Hillary Clinton becomes President. I even read a tweet from a Leftist saying President Trump is suspended from Presidential duties until the Senate trial is done.

Now, where did I put that booze?

The Right isn’t much better lately. The White House and many Trump-supporting pundits have advanced the notion the President isn’t really impeached because the House hasn’t officially presented the articles to the Senate. A novel idea, but with one major flaw: The House approved two articles of impeachment. You can look for any procedural loophole you want, but you can’t overlook the votes. Donald Trump is the third President in our history to be impeached. Period. End of discussion. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.

And where are our leaders in this mess? Well, they’re busy promoting the narratives their side wants to hear and believe, or they’re staying silent (I’m guessing to either stop themselves from looking foolish or to stop people from telling them off). Yet, if something erroneous comes out about them or affecting them directly, they will be the first ones breaking their silence and calling out the falsehoods because…reasons!

When you combine the lack of information, the absence of substantive pushback beyond “Nuh uh!”, and media and political inaction/fear, we have the perfect storm of stupid. And for people like me who know a thing or two about what’s going on, it’s tiring. So, I have a simple request.

Do Not Stupid Here.

I know it doesn’t make sense, but it’s an English translation of a sign in a foreign country that I’ve often wanted to adopt as a personal warning to others. And lately it’s become more of a necessity to let people know I’m not down for the clown show. If you want to discuss impeachment with me, all I ask is you come with an open mind and a logical, fact-based argument. And, no, “Orange Man Bad” or “Trump Good” doesn’t quality as an argument.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a video of a Yule Log burning that has my rapt attention.

Sit On It

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Nancy Pelosi can sit on the Articles of Impeachment all she wants. In fact she can sit on them until the 2020 election is over.

But of course by then President Trump will have won his landslide re-election. The Senate Republicans majority will be increased. And the Republicans will have retaken the House, and Nancy Pelosi will no longer be the Speaker.

The new Republican Speaker can continue with the program set by the Democratic Party and hold on to the Articles of Impeachment. This action will of course anger and cause the symptoms of Trump Derangement Syndrome to worsen in Leftist neverTrumpers everywhere.

Now in 2022, the Speaker of the House after the mid-term elections of that year can send the 3 year old Articles of Impeachment to the Senate, if the 2022 Speaker is a Democrat. If the Republicans still have the majority in 2022 then they can continue to hold on to it as the Democrats did in 2019.

But finally after the 2024 elections. The new Speaker of the House, no matter what party, can finally send the 2019 Articles of Impeachment to the Senate. Of course by this time the Senate will dismiss the charges since President Trump will have completed his 2nd term and will no longer be the active President. And a vote or trial wont matter.

And the votes are in

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The House has Impeached President Donald Trump. This was not unexpected at all given the impeachment process started 19 minutes after President Trump took office. The Leftist Democratic Party with their Trump Derangement Syndrome wanted to impeach this President at any cost. And now they have.

The results of the vote is also no surprise either. It was a very partisan issue. And the results speak for themselves on this as well. The final vote was 232 Yea and 196 Nay. 215 votes were needed for the measure to pass. And this could have been done without a single Republican even present.

231 Democrats voted for the Articles of Impeachment against President Trump. 194 Republicans and 2 Democrats voted against the Impeachment. I will tip my hat to Congressman Peterson of MN and Congressman Van Drew of NJ who were both able to see this farce for what it was. There were also 3 Republicans and 1 Democrat that did not vote. They should have and I think all 4 of them should be voted out of office.

Now President Trump has become the 3rd US President to be Impeached but unlike the previous impeachments. This one smacks of partisan manipulation in an attempt to remove a duly elected President because the opposition did not win in the 2106 election and they do not have the ability to win in 2020.

President Trump is no angel. But his administration has done great things for the United States and the world. We are far better off now then we were under the 2 previous administrations.

This Impeachment nonsense will now be forced on the Senate. There they will try the President. In order for the President to be found guilty and removed from office. The vote must be 67 or more finding the President guilty. I don’t see this happening. There wont be enough votes for it thankfully.

The Democratic Party will scream about how unfair the Senate proceedings are during this Trial. Ignoring the fact that their own proceedings in the House were unfair and even unlawful and Unconstitutional as well. But that is the par for the course with the Democratic Party. They can take those actions but the Republicans can never do the same. It has been this way for many decades.

I will say it a 3rd time. If President Trump is found Guilty in the Senate. The Leftist Democrats will NOT stop with the Impeachment of Trump. They will Impeach Pence before he can even take the oath of office as President with the hopes of also finding him Guilty in the Senate. Then Nancy Pelosi will be sworn in as President to finish the last few months of the presidential term. From that point the Leftist agenda will proceed full steam. With the further impeachments of all those appointed by President Trump, including Justice Kavenaugh. And the policies of the Trump Administration will be erased under Executive Order and the Republic will die. 

Shutdown Continues

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The government shutdown continues onward without any sign of it being revealed. And this is total fault of Congress. It is the duty of Congress to pass a budget, this has not been properly done since 2006. That’s more than 10 years ago.

Since the US Government hasn’t had a budget, it operates on continuing resolutions that only last a short period of time. This way both parties and the Administration can shutdown the government in order to promote a specific agenda. This is used by both the Republican party and Democratic party.

President Obama demanded the passage of Obamacare in order to fund the government and remove the shutdown that was imposed. And then Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, demanded that Obamacare needed to be passed in order to find out what was in it. That is and was absurd.

All President Trump is requesting is a small amount for border security. But again Nancy Pelosi isn’t going to have her Leftist Democratic host pass such a message. And she is confused since this is the first Republican President who isn’t bowing down before the Democratic tyranny machine.

Speaker Nancy Pelosi needs to do her job and pass the appropriate funding to reopen the government.

Suicide of a Nation

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How far the United States has fallen from it’s founding roots in Liberty and as a God-fearing and honoring nation can be so easily seen today.

During the Golden Globe awards Sunday night Christian Bale thanked Satan on international TV for his award and inspiration.

Within the newly elected House of Representatives we have several openly Communist members. A member who proudly promotes mental illness in the guise of transgenderism. Islamic fascists member numbers are growing as well.

This is exactly what suicide of a nation looks like. If the Left isn’t stopped the next move is to impeach the President. And they will succeed in the House. And the Senate must determine guilt or innocence.

It is a slippery slope we are heading towards. All that stands in the way of a Pelosi Presidency until 2020 are 2 impeachment trials in the Senate. And if she is victorious, the damage to the Republic could become irreversible.

A Year to Dismember

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The Chinese uses animals for their calendars to mark the different years in their cycles, such as the year of my birth, the Year of the Cock. (But I always seem to write the Year of the Boar on my checks.) Sometimes the media bestow a title upon a year, such as the Year of the Woman. In these traditions, I am starting off 2019 by christening it…the Year of Bad Decisions.

I came up with this idea after reading a piece on Twitchy about a pro-choice activist writing a children’s book about abortion to be released in 2020, and then posting a video about it on her Twitter feed. You read that right. Someone wrote a children’s book about abortion. Talk about not knowing your target audience!

Some might be saying “But that’s just one person on Twitter. Surely not everyone on it can be that misguided.” I assure you not everyone on Twitter is that tone deaf, but there are enough on both sides of the political spectrum to justify my boycott. As I’ve said, I won’t join Twitter because there are too many twits on it.

And when I think of something with too many twits, I think of Congress. Funny how that works out, huh? Anyway, Democrats take back control of the House of Representatives for the first time since 2011, and one of their first orders of business will be promoting Nancy Pelosi to Speaker of the House again. And what a bang-up job she did last time! This time will be different because Pelosi will be butting heads with a Republican Presi…oh, wait. She did that last time and was booted out of the Speakership within 4 years. Not to mention, she now has a whole caucus of Leftists to her Left who think she’s a corporate sell-out. And guess who is demanding the loudest for House Democrats to investigate President Donald Trump for everything short of jaywalking.

On the other side of the aisle, Republicans, especially those loyal to the President, are experiencing their own issues with bad decisions. Supporting higher tariffs, not addressing some of the major issues with the wall while settling on metaphors above literal concrete, and not speaking out when Trump says or does something stupid (often on the aforementioned den of stupidity known as Twitter) while attacking those who do have left the Right on shaky ground. At a time when party unity is imperative and after a preventable loss of the House, Republicans are too busy trying to placate the President and his supporters (thus trying to get reelected) to take a hard look at the possible reasons why they lost the House in the first place. Spoiler Alert: it might be because Trump spends more time Tweeting than leading. And with the possibility/probability/guaran-damn-tee Democrats will be investigating Trump and calling out Republicans for standing with the President, there may be a shortage of popcorn in the DC area and both coasts.

Outside of politics, the media, activist groups, and celebrities keep making bad decisions. This begs the question of what these bad decisions have in common. The answer: a lack of a filter. In recent years, people have decided to go with their gut instincts before posting anything online or going to the press with it. However, these decisions to go public are often met with scorn and ridicule because they’re planned out about as well as a murder mystery written by Kathy Griffin, last year’s recipient of the Dumbest Idea Yet Award. With a little thought, many of these bad ideas might never have seen the light of day, which is both good and bad. It’s good because then we wouldn’t have to suffer through the half-hearted apologies and twisted explanations of why the idea wasn’t that bad. On the other hand, it’s bad because it would deprive us of something to laugh at. Speaking personally, though, I encourage people to think before they speak or act because once that genie is out of the bottle in today’s media, it’s impossible to put it back in.

Failing that, invest heavily in popcorn because that industry is about to…pop.

I’ll see myself out.