Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

The Resistance is active again. In between calling President Donald Trump a racist because feefees and filling social media with hashtags and talking points, they’re telling us to vote in the midterm elections. And with all the campaign literature clogging up our mailboxes, who knew there was an election coming up?

But this isn’t just any midterm election. This is the one that could mean the difference between saving our country and an existence that would make “The Handmaid’s Tale” look like a Norman Rockwell lithograph. The Resistance even adopted a slogan: Vote like your life depends on it because it does. Let’s see…breathing, food, shelter…nope, don’t see voting as a fundamental need.

What is it about Election 2018 that has the Left hyperventilating more than a claustrophobe trying to get out of a paper bag while breathing into a smaller bag to try to fight off a panic attack? Good thing we have a blogger who can shed some light into this. But since she’s out of town, they’re letting me take a crack at it.

Election 2018

What the Left thinks it means – the most important election in history, but only if Democrats win

What it really means – a repeat of past midterm elections, just with more Leftist freakouts

After not being able to impeach the President or even make him look even the slightest bit like the evil fascist warmonger they’ve tried to make him out to be, the Left has put a lot of focus on the midterm elections. In doing so, they have tried to keep spirits high by predicting a “blue wave” and avoided talking about party mistakes and candidate scandals. And to be fair, it’s not like the Democrats have a member of the Democratic National Committee who is accused of assaulting a woman, right?

Okay, scratch that.

The Left has put most of their electoral eggs in the 2018 midterm basket because they feel they have no other way to stop Trump. They’ve tried yelling at us, calling Trump supporters horrible names, attempting to assault and/or kill Republicans, and generally dismissing voters not like them as dumber than Forrest Gump on a five year binge on old school NyQuil. You know the kind I’m talking about. The NyQuil with enough alcohol in it to drop a rhino while clearing up its sinuses.

Anyway, the Left’s attempts to persuade people not already on their side to join up haven’t worked well. Maybe it’s, oh I don’t know, the fact you treat us like crap? Just thinking outside the ballot box here, kids. So, after over 2 years of taking the same approach to attracting potential voters, the Left has gone into overdrive to try to persuade people to vote for their candidates. And, in a clear sign they’ve learned from past mistakes, they’re doing the same thing they did for the past 2+ years…only louder.

The Left says they need to win the midterm elections to ensure Trump is kept in check and to try to reverse the horrible things he’s done, like…tax cuts that benefitted a vast majority of people? Well, they haven’t really ironed out all the details yet, but by Election Day, I’m sure they’ll have something…

The real reason I think the Left is obsessed with the midterm elections is because they’ve been out of power for a while, and they don’t like it. Remember how Democrats acted in 2007 after they took back the House from Republicans? They acted like they were going to be in power for a long time, and the election of Barack Obama in 2008 only fed into that idea. Well, apparently a long time only lasts 4 years in Leftist time because Republicans took back control of the House in 2011. Shortly after that, the Senate went Republican and left all the rules former Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid made to come back and haunt the Senate Democrats. What can I say, Mr. Reid? Mitch McConnell warned you.

Now with Donald Trump sitting in the White House and the prospect of conservative Supreme Court Justices looming on the horizon, the Left have a perfect storm of impotence on their hands. They’ve let power slip out of their hands and they’re willing to do anything to get it back, including actions they would have decried if Trump and the GOP had done them.

We’ve spent a lot of time in this blog entry on the Left, but the question remains: how important are the 2018 midterm elections? To political junkies on both sides of the political aisle, they’re pretty important. To average folks like you and me? Not so much. In the end, one group is trying to take jobs from another group because the first group says they can do the jobs better since the other group is a bunch of dunderheads with IQs somewhere in the neighborhood of toe jam. And the other group is trying to prevent the first group from taking power because they are doing the best they can while the first group is slightly smarter than bread mold. How convincing these arguments are depends on who listens to and believes them.

I may follow politics like I do professional football, but I don’t think any politician is going to have that much direct impact on our lives. In groups, yes, but individually, no. I look at it this way. Most of the time, these folks don’t bother to contact me when they’re about to vote on legislation, so I don’t bother to consult them when it’s time for me to vote. If they come around, I’ll listen to them and consider their viewpoints. Otherwise, I’m fine voting for whomever I feel will do the best job.

That’s why I’m voting for my dog, Chico.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

We’re entering into the home stretch of the 2018 midterm elections, and it couldn’t come soon enough. I was tired of this year’s midterm elections in, oh, 2016. And with the Left, this could be the most important election in our history because, as they put it, “Trump is a doodyhead.” (Actually, it’s not that reason in so many words, but it boils down to that.)

To help the cause to elect more Democrats, the Left has once again jumped to social media to start a new hashtag, #VoteThemOut, referencing a desire to vote out Republicans. Because, as we all know from the previous Administration, hashtags make people DO something.

Well, in this case, it’s inspiring me to do something: write this week’s Leftist Lexicon!

#VoteThemOut

What the Left thinks it means – an online movement to vote out Republicans and replace them with progressive Democrats

What it really means – a hashtag that will accomplish nothing

Every couple of years, we go through the same tired dance. One party wants to keep power, and the other party wants to strip power away from the other party because the other party is evil incarnate. The only way for the latter party to fix the problems caused by the evil party is to elect more good people. And every couple of years, nothing changes in a significant manner, no matter who wins the election.

Blather. Rinse. Repeat.

Although the Left has a ton of motivation to vote for Democrats and progressives this year, their use of a hashtag to promote it doesn’t exactly scream “Vote for us because we have ideas.” It’s closer to “Vote for us because the other side sucks.” Enter the hashtag #VoteThemOut. It sends the same message as “Vote for us because the other side sucks,” but does it in a way that is short, memorable, and catchy. It’s the social media equivalent of a bumper sticker, but without the need to find space on a vehicle to stick it.

And you might be able to guess what else I feel can stick it.

Hashtags may be what the cool kids do, but it makes for poor political strategy because it doesn’t necessarily create action. Remember #BringBackOurGirls? It was a valid sentiment that hoped to garner positive results, but it worked as well as CNN’s fact checking department. It brought attention to the situation and did…absolutely nothing.

Just like the ribbons worn on the red carpets in Hollywood, hashtags are a great way to show you care about an issue and they seem to absolve the person using them of the responsibility of actually doing something about it. After all, they did the hard part by telling people know about an issue. It’s up to others to do the easy stuff and make things happen!

And, yes, I’m being sarcastic here.

In order for hashtags to become more than just words in the cyber-ether, someone has to act on them. But the problem with the midterm elections is only a limited number of people can act on them since we’re dealing with state-level elections, albeit with national implications. A Leftist in California tweeting #VoteThemOut can have it go global, but the impact it has is limited to the voters or potential voters where Democrats want to take Republican seats. Further diluting the impact is the fact #VoteThemOut will only garner support from people already leaning towards that idea.

Can you say “echo chamber,” kids? I knew you could.

Let’s say for the sake of argument the hashtag catches on and results in the “Blue Wave” the Left keeps saying is going to happen. What then? Given the fact most Leftists see it as a chance to impeach President Donald Trump, not much will get accomplished. Oh, there may be some other progressive ideas that may get proposed and maybe even voted on by the House and Senate, but unless impeachment is on the table, the Left won’t be happy. (Mainly because they think they can remove Trump and everyone else in the line of succession, force the country to hold a new election, add more Justices to the Supreme Court, and other wild conclusions devoid of Constitutional grounding. But, hey, why let a little thing like the Constitution get in the way of getting what the Left wants, right?)

Surely this time will be different, the Left will say. And they will be wrong. When there is a seismic shift in political power, rarely is it followed by a flurry of positive results that benefit the country. Why, it’s almost as if…politicians promise the moon, but only deliver green cheese!

That’s because government isn’t in the problem-solving business. I’ve noted it before, but the short version is current government needs there to be constant problems to retain power, money, and control. If Democrats sweep into power in 2018, all the problems they say are caused by Republicans will either be “forgotten” or found not to be as big of a problem as they claimed they were. And if the “Blue Wave” happens, a “Red Wave” will come after that and then Republicans will be the ones to “forget” problems or go along to get along.

The fact we still have a Department of Education in spite of Ronald Reagan’s promise to eliminate it back in the 1980s is proof of that.

If you want to vote out Democrats and/or Republicans because you feel things will be better without them, go for it. Just try to act surprised when nothing comes of it.

Endangered Swamp RINOs

I for one am very thankful that Donald Trump won the election of 2016. And it’s not because I voted for him since the Iowa Caucus or that I am some sort of Trump fanatic or “cultist” either.

The President isn’t a regular politician. And like any man he does have his faults. I do not agree with everything he had done as President either. And I know he isn’t a Conservative.

But President Donald Trump does have common sense and many Conservative values are rooted in common sense. His Presidency shines a light into the heart of the dark swamp that is Washington D.C. and Establishment politics of both Republicans and the Democrats.

Had Hillary Clinton won in November of 2016, even with a Republican win in the US House and US Senate, we would have seen more of the same that we saw in the previous 8 years under President Obama.

The House and Senate would have passed the complete repeal of ObamaCare only to have it vetoed by President Clinton. Likewise they would have passed immigration reform and all the other changes they are now dragging their feet on. However, they would have approved President Clinton’s cabinet and appointees in record time.

We the People, would have cheered the actions of Congress. For moving swiftly with the change of power in the White House and for passing the legislation that would benefit the majority of the nation. And we would be duped into thinking and believing that Congress was the vanguard protecting us from Liberalism. That would be the world if Hillary Clinton had won.

Without President Donald Trump, those so-called “neverTrump Conservatives” would have fooled us into believing that they are Conservatives. But thanks to the light being shown on them from the President. We see that they are only RINOs (Republicans In Name Only.) And a year from now in the mid-term elections. We will send the majority of them packing their bags.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

Happy Labor Day weekend, kids! As we take our first tentative steps into fall, Labor Day elicits quite a few memories and emotions. Anticipation for the leaves to start falling, as well as the temperatures. The knowledge we’re not supposed to wear white until spring, unless you’re a Klan member. And remembering the hard work of the men and women who comprise the working class.

The demographics of the working class may have changed throughout the years, but they still represent a vital voting bloc for the Left and the Right. If you persuade the working class to vote for your candidate, you stand a good chance of winning an election, or at least doing better than Evan McMullin in 2016. In honor of Labor Day (and because I really didn’t have anything else to write about this week), let’s take a closer look at the working class.

working class

What the Left thinks it means – a vital group of voters who need Leftists to be their champions against Big Business

What it really means – a group of people who have been jerked around by both sides of the aisle

As a working man myself, I am on the front lines of the struggles the working class faces. Whether it’s fighting traffic to and from work, trying to make each dollar we earn stretch as far as it can, or even just trying to get through the day without getting written up, fired, or, worst of all, being asked to stay late because everybody else went home already, the working men and women of America are being asked/told/demanded/expected to grind it out day after day without complaint. Put on a happy face and eat that crap sandwich like it was your last meal.

That’s why I find it laughable that the Left and the Right try to get us to believe they represent the working class in Washington, DC. The political class, most of whom have never done anything more physical than blocking someone on Twitter, have zero clue of what John and Jane Doe of Everytown, USA, have to put up with just to try to keep a roof over their heads. After all, Congresscritters get tons of perks for being elected, so even if they’re from the smallest of small towns in the states they represent, they quickly forget what it means to work hard most every day.

But when it’s time for reelection, you can count on them to show up and shake hands and kiss babies (just don’t get those two mixed up) in an attempt to “reconnect with the great people of [insert state].” Once their reelection is sewn up tighter than a XXXS corset on Roseanne Barr, they promptly forget about those great people and head back to Washington to live their lives of luxury.

Gee. I wonder if that might be the reason I think the working class is getting screwed over by the political class…naaaaaaah!

The Left claims to be the party of the working class (mainly because they get tons of money from labor unions who are often as out of touch as their Leftist masters), but this claim is as baseless as a news story on MSNBC. When you boil it down, the Left doesn’t care about anything about the working class and merely gives them lip service. Take a look at how much disdain they heap upon WalMart, for example. The Left wants WalMart eliminated from the economic equation for one reason: WalMart doesn’t have a union. Sure, they’ll give you a ton of other reasons ranging from alleged lower pay and importing products from China, but it comes down to the lack of a union. Yet, WalMart makes products and services affordable for people in the working class because they’ve figured out something the Left can’t seem to grasp: you can’t keep your doors open if you don’t have customers. WalMart isn’t perfect, but they do enough right to keep people coming in (usually after making highly questionable fashion choices). By going after WalMart, the Left has made it clear they don’t care about the actual working class, just about their money and votes.

The Right isn’t much better. They have the image of being in the back pockets of Big Business to the point they have permanent disfigurement from the stitching in said back pockets. And why is that? Because they haven’t fought back against the image. The Right reaching out to the working class is often as cringeworthy as Michael Dukakis in a tank, John Kerry in hunting gear, or Debbie Wasserman Schultz any time. And this is disappointing because the working class needs people fighting for them in Washington, and it’s clear the Left is like Pee Wee Herman boxing MIke Tyson.

But there is a glimmer of hope for the Right in the form of Donald Trump. Trump for all of his faults has a grasp on both the corporate and the working world, which came out during the 2016 election. And the working class rewarded him with their votes, much to the consternation of Hillary Clinton and the DNC. If the Right can pick up what Trump did in the campaign and build upon that by convincing the working class they can coexist with the business class, that will be beneficial to both. The working class will have their champions on Washington, and the business class will have an in with their workers.

In the meantime, the working class will have to keep plugging away, doing what it needs to do to survive. Just like they always seem to do.

The Strange Case of James Comey (or With Friends Like These…)

Michael Savage likes to say liberalism is a mental disorder. After seeing the Left turn on FBI Director James Comey with all the stability of Sybil on PCP, he might be onto something. Or on something, whatever the case may be.

The Left has a love/hate relationship with Comey. Sometimes, like when he declined to pursue charges against Hillary Clinton over her private email server, the Left loved him. When Comey did something they didn’t like, like announcing the FBI would be reopening the case against Clinton, the Left loved to hate him. Comey became the Left’s favorite piñata when it suited them, but he’s gotten back into their good graces recently by rejecting Donald Trump’s claims former President Barack Obama wiretapped Trump Tower during the campaign. Now that he’s anti-Trump, the Left loves Comey again.

Maybe I was a bit off with the Sybil reference. Sybil was far more well-adjusted.

Some conservatives were in a similar situation as the Left in that their opinions on Comey depended on what he did for them politically. However, a good chunk of the Right saw Comey as an inept bumbler whose decision-making skills made Charlie Sheen look like Solomon. When the FBI Director tells you he can’t prosecute a Presidential candidate because she’s more famous or powerful than you or me, that’s the sign he can’t hack the job he has.

Now that he’s being more of a pawn than a prosecutor, Comey’s going to get more attention from both sides of the aisle, and not for a good reason. The Left will use him as a meat shield to deflect even the most credible of concerns over whether President Obama tapped the lines at Trump Tower. The Right will use him as a scapegoat for enabling the Left.

And I will use him as a target for mockery.

Comey appears to have gone to the Leona Helmsley School of Law, given how he treated Hillary with more kid gloves than a Minnesota daycare center in January. The fact he even raised the “she’s Hillary Clinton” defense is an indication he has been compromised to the point of ineffectiveness. He should have been kicked to the curb back in July 2016, but as we’ve seen with the Obama Administration, incompetence was a resume enhancer.

I get the feeling Comey is trying to play to whichever crowd will lavish him with praise. If he gets invited to parties by parroting the Left, he will be further to the Left than David Brock. If that party scene dries up, he’ll come back to the Right and say and do whatever they want him to do. In other words, James Comey is the FBI equivalent of John McCain.

But eventually neither side will want to be seen with him, and then he’ll be left trying to reconcile the multiple positions he will have taken to that point. And he will fail. The problem with trying to please everyone is you wind up pleasing no one, not even yourself. Comey seems to be in that phase right now, but his value is diminishing. If you stand with truth and integrity, you will gain friends and enemies, but both will be the right ones.

Provda Is More Truthful

The Liberals should read their own news reports in full before commenting on them. And they also need to read the US Constitution as well.

Yes they are at it again. The fake news, aka the Liberal mainstream media and propaganda arm of the Democratic Party. Are spreading editorials as news about Russian involvement in the 2016 presidential elections.

This is of course to undermine our lawfully and legitimately elected President Donald J. Trump. Simply because the Liberals don’t want the rule of law or a Republican in office ever again. And they still don’t understand why Hillary Clinton lost the election. So it has to be massive fraud committed by the Republicans and the Trump Administration with the help and backing of Russia.

But this whole idea and notion is absurd. Even the very Liberal media in their very reports state there is no evidence to back up their statements. That makes the reports pure fiction.

The rank and file Liberal repeats the headlines without reading the details. Shouting out, stopping traffic, raising lawlessness, and igniting various flame wars across the internet.

If they actually read the details they would see there is no evidence to the allegations. And if they were to read the Constitution and laws of the United States they would also know that to be charged and found guilty of a crime, evidence is required.

Like it or not, Donald Trump is the President. Try again in four years with a better candidate that actually resonates with the voters. Our laws are clear. Stop with the false accusations simply because your chosen candidate lost the election. It happens. We lost 2 elections in a row. Our laws are clear, when you have some hard evidence against the President for some real wrong doing. Bring it forward.

Otherwise please stop writing fiction against the President.

Town Hall Meetings

While Congress has been in recess this past week Senators and Congressmen alike have returned to their home states to speak with the people. We don’t hear about any town hall events held by the Democratic members of Congress, but the Republican members are making headlines across the country.

At every single Republican town hall meeting this week there have been Leftist agitators shouting down other attendees and the Representative. Demanding answers on the whole Leftist agenda questions.

Many of these agitators are not even from the state or district of the Representative. They are disrespectful towards the other attendees, the Representative and any pre-established theme of the town hall or round table.

The continued spoiled child-like behavior of the Left is appalling. They believed their own lies about the November 2016 elections that Hillary would be elected President and that the American people would vote Democrat to continue the Leftist agenda.

However the American people spoke differently last November and the Republican’s swept the elections. These agitators do not truly represent the people and their views. The Republicans in Congress know and are doing their job of Making America Great Again.

Russian Hacking

OK enough with the uneducated rants across the internet on the Russian Hacking. Donald Trump is not to blame. It’s the Democrats. Their servers were hacked. It’s THEIR fault.

You can’t hack a server without a way in. That way in usually comes from a user (in this case a Democrat) that falls for a emailed phishing attempt. Which was the case according to the report issued by the US Government.

Check your URLs before giving confidential login information to a site. Make sure it is really that site, especially if you got there through an email link. That is the number 2 rule when it comes to computers.

The number 1 rule is always backup your data.

The Russian hackers didn’t change any data, their just took copies of it. Nothing released was false information. It was all true. The Democratic party doesn’t want to have real transparency because of their unethical practices. This is why they are upset.

Another way the Russian hackers can get in is through an exploitable vulnerability in the server’s operating system or software. This too is the fault of the Democrats that ran their server without insuring it was properly hardened against attacks.

Even with a hardened server and vigilant users the Russian hacking still could have succeeded. But it would have been far more difficult.

But just like in the corporate world, if you have a data breach it’s is your fault for having it. Secure your data, secure your servers. Setup false honey pots that attract hackers to bogus data. Make it as difficult as possible to breach your security. Physical as well as over the internet. Someone could have easily gotten physical access to the server in order to gain entry.

The President Elect had NOTHING to do with the data breach. The Democratic Party had EVERYTHING to do with it. And they are the root cause of the data being released to the public at large.

If Hillary Clinton would have won the election, and the Republicans were the one’s hacked. She and the Democratic Party would be using that leaked data against every member of the GOP it could find. And those crying out on how bad Trump is would be cheering the Russians for exposing Republican follies.

How He Did It

After the dust settled this past Tuesday, Donald Trump won the Presidency. Of course, with all the crying from the Left going on, it’s hard to believe there is any dust.

There are going to be a lot of people looking at the 2016 election and trying to figure out how Trump beat Hillary Clinton. Some have already come up with their own conclusions, including racism, sexism, xenophobia, and just voters being down right dumb for voting for Trump. (Pro tip for the Left: This is not how you heal the nation after a tough loss.) So, let me try my hand at analyzing Election 2016 and how Trump won.

Trump ran to the center early.

In politics, it’s conventional wisdom for a candidate to shore up the party base to get the nomination and then try to appeal to voters in the middle. Trump went the other way. He made the middle his base. By adopting a more centrist approach early on, Trump attracted voters from all sides of the political spectrum, which helped him in states like Pennsylvania and Iowa that are more “purple” than red or blue. It didn’t work perfectly, but it worked well enough to change the landscape.

Hillary Clinton was a horrible candidate.

I know this is hard to believe, but Clinton isn’t exactly known for her political acumen. After getting beaten by a half-term junior Senator from Illinois in 2008, she made many of the same mistakes over again and made many new ones to add a little spice to the old formula.

The RNC accepted Trump earlier than the DNC accepted Clinton.

After months of being at odds with each other, Trump and the RNC called a truce and at least tried to be friendly towards each other. Compare that to the DNC, plagued by scandal and ineptitude in rigging the nomination for Hillary. The only way the DNC could have handled the Democrat nomination process any worse would have been to have let Michael Moore, Alec Baldwin, and Cher run the whole thing.

Wikileaks happened.

Remember when Julian Assange was the Left’s BFF? Yeah, good times. At least, until Hillary ran for President and Wikileaks started posting a bunch of emails showing how corrupt Hillary and the DNC were. And instead of doing something positive about it, the Left started attacking Assange, accusing him of being in league with Trump, Russia, Vladimir Putin, the Republican Party, aliens at Area 51, the Gnomes of Zurich, and, scariest of all, Ryan Seacrest. By not dealing with the electronic elephant in the room, Hillary and the DNC prolonged the damage Wikileaks did.

Trump wasn’t a wuss.

Democrats and Leftists count on Republicans to be on the defensive whenever there is negative press about said Republicans. For months, the Left threw out a slew of “Trump hates women/blacks/gays/humans/puppies” lines, and Trump didn’t back down for the most part. He stuck to his guns, and the Left didn’t figure out how he wasn’t sniveling for forgiveness like a televangelist caught on video with a hooker and more blow than a Colombian 80s party. So, they kept at it, and it still didn’t faze Trump in the least. Insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result. It might also be the way the Left deals with President Trump for 4 years.

The Left believed the polls they ran.

The Left has this amazing ability to believe they are the smartest people in any room, even when they aren’t the only ones in the room. When they saw polling data that favored Hillary (conducted by people who also favored Hillary), they lulled themselves into a false sense of security because they wanted to believe Hillary would win. Since that has gone over as well as a Lena Dunham burlesque revue, you would think the Left would learn to be more discerning. Given how many pro-Hillary people are refusing to accept the election results, I’m not putting any money on them learning from this mistake.

And finally…

Hillary really sucked ass as a candidate.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

With Election Day being literally hours away from the time this blog post is published, it’s time we discuss a concept both the Left and the Right dislike: third parties. Although the choice of candidates that gets the most focus is Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump (which is the equivalent of choosing to be shot with a rifle or be shot with another rifle), there are other candidates out there vying for attention and votes. To that end, let’s take a closer look at third parties.

third parties

What the Left thinks it means: disgruntled Democrats whose actions guarantee Republican wins

What the Right thinks it means: disgruntled Republicans whose actions guarantee Democrat wins

What it really means: disgruntled voters looking for an option aside from Democrats and Republicans

That’s right, kids. Both the Left and the Right get this one wrong. In a binary system, there are only two answers. However, our elections aren’t binary systems. As much as we are lead to believe there are only two parties worth mentioning, there are others who have national attention. The Libertarian Party. The Green Party. The Constitution Party. The Socialist Workers Party. The Keep Everybody Up To Their Eyeballs In Doritos Party. (Okay, I made that last one up, but still…not a bad idea.)

A common complaint about third parties is they draw votes away from the major parties, which is true. But that’s where a lot of people stop; without asking the all-important question of why. Why are so many people opting out of the Democrat/Republican dynamic? Simple.

Because people are starting to see the two major parties as being not that different after all. Although they tend to fight for the cameras, behind the scenes the party leaders get along better than they want us to believe. It doesn’t help matters any that Republican leaders roll over for Democrats like a dog in a centrifuge. The average Democrat and the average Republican have shifted to the left in the past couple of decades, leaving a lot of people on both sides hanging on to an idea that isn’t reality anymore. Just like those people who think socialism could still work.

Another area where the Left and the Right get third parties wrong is the notion a vote for a third party means a vote for the opposition. Although the effect may be seen that way, the reality is quite different. A vote not for a Democrat and Republican isn’t for one or the other; it’s for another option. Just because you drink RC Cola doesn’t mean you hate Pepsi or Coke. It simply means you like RC Cola. You’re not part of a vast Pepsi wing conspiracy trying to undercut Coke or a Coke cabal wanting to bring down Pepsi. Now, if you like Dr. Pepper, you might have some issues.

There is a reason third parties tend to thrive in elections like the one we’re seeing now. When people aren’t happy with the candidates we’re given, our eyes tend to wander. It’s one of the great parts of being an American. We have the freedom to look at candidates like Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton and say, “You know, maybe we should think about writing in someone else because these two candidates suck.”

The reaction to third parties by the Left and the Right is predictable: pretend they’re like your annoying little brother or sister and ignore them. Yet, if they want to avoid losing more potential voters, they should do the exact opposite. There are some differences between Republicans and Libertarians, but there are many more points of agreement. On the other side of the aisle, there are some differences between Democrats and socialists, but these days, they’re hard to find.

The best way for Democrats and Republicans to deal with the possibility of third parties is to listen to them. Many of the voters flocking to third parties do so because the two major parties have all but abandoned them. A Democrat who takes at least some interest in advancing some of the platform planks of the Green Party stands a greater chance of getting Green Party votes than a Democrat who treats the Green Party like most of the world treats John Kerry. A Republican who listens to the concerns of Libertarians will not just get a chance to get crossover votes, but also stands a chance to score some killer weed!

Regardless of how you vote on Tuesday, remember the only wasted vote is one not cast. If you’re not thrilled with the dog turd sandwich and the cow turd sandwich Democrats and Republicans are offering, you are free to choose from another menu, preferably one that doesn’t rely so much on fecal material as foodstuffs.

Oh, and if you’re wondering who I’m voting for, I’m casting a vote for C’thulu and the Sweet Meteor of Death. Sure, their victory would mean the end of the world as we know it, but now that the Chicago Cubs have won the World Series, I can die happy.